How To Find a High Quality Wedding DJ (Part 3 - Find a DJ That Cares)▼

By now, if you've read my other hubs, you should have a pretty good idea of whether or not a DJ is skilled enough to perform your wedding successfully. But... Do they care enough about it to put forth the effort it takes to fulfill you vision?

Lots of DJs are in the profession for the money. Most are, actually. There's a lot of effort to DJing a wedding, and with that comes a decent monetary reward. However, some DJs enjoy what they're doing, and some do not.

To discern between the two, the first thing to look for is interest. When you first talk to the DJ, pay attention to the first couple of subjects that are brought up. If any of them are about money, you may be speaking to a DJ that doesn't care about you to want to know any more than what is in your purse. If a DJ claims to be one of the least expensive, or claims to be able match any other quote you get, you're almost certainly dealing with a DJ that doesn't care about much more than doing a good enough job that someone else recommends him. He's relying on people's low-standards.

What you want instead is a DJ that asks about you and your event. Maybe he'll congratulate you first on your engagement. He'll ask where you're getting married, how long you've known each other, and maybe how you and your fiance met. If this happens, it may be time to finally let that smile emerge, because you may have found yourself the right DJ!

The right DJ will also talk to you about your musical tastes, after all these are very important to know if he's going to perform sucessfully, right? He may also ask you if you've hired a coordinator, and if not may recommend one to you from the Association of Bridal Consultants (ABC) or the Event Planners Association, or better yet, offer some suggestions to be aware of if you're going to organize your wedding yourself. Any DJ that is wedding-seasoned has more than a few bits of advice to dispense to eager knowledge-seeking brides and grooms. And what's more, good DJs like to share this knowledge without even having a guarantee that you'll hire them. This is a good thing to observe; it shows that they genuinely care about you having a great night.

In any basic psychology class, theories of communication exist which determine a person's intents and motives based on verbal and non-verbal cues. Since you're talking to the DJ on the phone, only the verbal cues matter. Here's some to watch for:

• Talking too fast-- This saleman technique is used to keep control of the conversation. If one's speech is quick with little pause between sentences, they are trying to keep the attention on them and not give you a chance to speak. This one is fairly obvious. If while the person is talking a question comes to your head but then you keep waiting for a chance to ask it, you've just been a victim of this tactic.
• Rushing back into their patter-- This one goes along with the previous technique. It goes like this: When you do finally get a chance to speak, the response to your question is quick and then the DJ goes right back into their practiced monologue. This type of DJ is one who has a speech prepared beforehand and thinks that if they say it word for word it will wow you into signing up. They have no regard for much else besides making sure you have heard every word of their speech because they think that each word has some 'weight' to it, and that the right word said to you will be the deciding factor of whether or not you hire them. Steer clear of these DJs, unless you like generic monologue.
• Not answering the question-- This technique is not only obvious, it is usually irritating. This occurs when you ask a question and the answer doesn't actually answer it. It usually signifies one thing: The answer to that question is either detrimental to their efforts to persuade you, or they don't actually know the answer but aren't willing to admit it. Either thing is bad news. If the answer is detrimental, you're going to end up finding out the hard way (once you've hired them and then witness whatever it is in the middle of your reception). If they don't know the answer and it is something that you thought was important, this shows their lack of experience.
• Not making the effort to explain things-- Everyone knows technical things in their field. A surgeon can tell you they will use a dermatome and a trocar to perform your operation. A mechanic may tell you that they are going to use an OBD-II scanner to determine your problem. A computer tech will mention that your BIOS is corrupt and they need to flash your EPROM. Sure, these are all correct terms and in some way do demonstrate that the professional in question is good at their craft, but they surely do not allow the receiver of the information to understand what is actually being said, do they? If a DJ really cares about you and your night, they may use terms you don't understand, but they'll always follow it up with a 'laymans' explanation. Good DJs know that others don't know the technical terms of their craft, but they also know how to explain it in a way that everyone can understand, and what's more, they care about whether the other person understands it.

It is a common belief that some characteristics of human nature are innate and immeasurable. I believe this to be true about a human's ability to sense when another person cares about them. If somewhere during your conversation you start feeling uneasy, it may be time to say thanks and look elsewhere for your DJ. Remember that your gut instinct is built-into the human body to do one thing-- Protect it!

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Missed the previous hubs? Read part one and part two.